When tipping, start by writing a smaller amount and crossing it out, then proceed to tip whatever you want. Your service person will appreciate that you reconsidered and upgraded your opinion of their performance.
When expensing meals from business travel, add a few dollars to the tip section on your receipt above what you actually tip. That way both you and the server make a few bucks off the tab.
Don't wanna tip at a restaurant but don't want people to think you're a dick? Pay with a card and write "On table" on the tip line. Your server will think someone stole their tip off the table instead of blaming you.
If and when you plan on having kids, have an embarrassing middle name picked out. When the little shit decides to act up in public or around friends, you'll have this handy tip up your sleeve.
If you’re unsatisfied with a waiter/waitresses service, tip 1% instead of 0%. They will take it more personally as if you tip 0% they will just assume you’re a cheapskate.
Drug Dealer did you wrong? Call cops with anonymous tip saying you saw a person with a gun run into their house. Say suspect is opposite skin color of said dealer so cops do a complete search. Drugs/paraphernalia will most likely be found. Boom, no more pesky dealer.
Don’t tip your delivery driver and use the extra money to buy more pizzas.
When you order delivery, send your kids to the door with exact change. Kids dont know how to tip, right?
Bring a flask of vodka to the bar, ask for soda water with lime (usually free), mix when the moment is right. (but still tip yer bartenders ya asshole)
Put a "Donations for Houston" sign on your tip jar.